Archive

Monthly Archives: November 2020

Podcast 23: 8 Ways to Master Patience on Thanksgiving

Patience and Resilience for Thanksgiving with or without Family

Podcast (Audio Only)

In this episode Joanne Williams, LCSW discusses the Nature of Mastering Patience, especially with Thanksgiving that might be without family at this Holiday.

Summary of today Podcast: Some things that we can do this Thanksgiving without our families getting together as we usually do. Resiliency, nurturing Patience are keys and doing some things that relieve stress.

  1. How we handle impatience comes with a high price if we don’t learn how.
  2. Are you afraid of being bored? 
  3. Patience is a choice-
  4. Turn your impatience to Good Use 

Question for today is? How can I change my impatience to being more patient?

Dr. Amad Massud from the Mayo Clinic Reports on CBS Sunday Morning on 10/25/20 says It is important to Master our Impatience for multiple reasons.

In a study it was found we are afraid of being bored so much so that 70% of participants in the study would rather receive an electric shock than be bored.

The opposite of Patience is not Impatience, it is anxiety, Illness, injury, addiction, Loneliness, and death. These are some of the high prices we pay for Impatience.  You may say that this is extreme?  Impatience creates anxiety as we wait. Loneliness with Covid isolation, because we want to get out of our houses more, it can cause Injury because of impulsiveness, road rage,  increased addiction from the stress of changes from Covid and fears of succumbing to it, increase in deaths from explosive angry, that then can Increase heart attacks by 2-8 fold for the next few hours.  This is serious.  Have you noticed how your body feels after you get really angry?  I have felt my temples pulsing and a surge of cortisol and adrenaline that almost feels like I have to “come down” from it.  I am an impatient person, so I am really practicing these things, because I didn’t realize the damage this can do.

Impatience evil twin is stress. The stress of everyday life and your reaction to what happens to you in your everyday routine can increase blood pressure and changes to your Heart Rate. Think about waiting for a plane to come in, or not knowing what is happening to some one, impatience and stress have negative effects on our emotions and our physical body.  Even For several hours after the call.

Impatience can have an effect even on our chromosomes. At the end of chromosomes are telomeres. From blood samples shows that Stress makes the telomeres smaller.  Which when we have shorter or smaller Telomeres it shows aging of the chromosomes from stress.  One thing that impatience does is increasing aging.

There are things that you can do to lower your impatience and stress. So lets talk about those:

Not having control over things on the outside can increase stress and impatience.  But, we can Choose to be patient. Helping yourself live longer, happier, look younger and helping your family also live happier life by choosing to look at ways to increase your patience.  Your life may depend on it.

Maybe your thanksgiving family gathering is at your sister’s house with her weird husband or “crazy uncle” Ed who drinks to much.  Waiting for the food to be ready, can’t watch football in your favorite room and chair, because company is using it.  Can you feel the impatience and gritting of the teeth starting and the tightening of your sphincter?  You are just trying to get through the day.

This is a test of your ability to have patience and cope when your routine messed up, can’t have your favorite chair or the of your favorite team to watch that calms you down. Well, have a few drinks as you way to cope. Which lowers your inhibitions, and you say something that is hurt, that mays everyone uncomfortable.

Or worse, you can’t go to the traditional Thanksgiving, because of Covid. You are left alone or just you and your SO and you both just sink into your own corners and are sad and lonely.

1.How about make a coping plan before the day for what you can do?

  • Create a new tradition. Something you want to do or some food that you never have because it isn’t “traditional”.  Create Something to look forward to.

How does being ungrateful and stubborn about tradition ever Bring anything good things to the Table?

  • Plan or think though what you CAN do. Take a drive to a scenic place.  Take a brisk walk in the woods with the dog.  Sit in nature for a while.
  • What would feel exciting to you. Make it happen. Think about it and plan it.
  • Enjoy doing something together with your SO that make you laugh, a new game or cooking a new recipe, just to smile and laugh, no pressure.
  • Make something romantic and soothing with music or dancing. Karaoke
  • Invite someone who makes you feel good when they are there.
  • “If your heart is broken, make art with the pieces."
    ― Shane Koyczan
  1. Resiliency can fire up your body. You don’t need to have fist fights with the corona virus, you can empower the billions of immune cells to fight with this virus and when you are resilient your immune cells are stronger in waging that war for you.
  2. Turn on your impatience to good use. If you want to. You can make a choice too. Make a decision to make yourself more relevant by learning and training ourselves about patience. Rise above impatience. Do this for yourself and your family. You will all be better off for it. Not with “white knuckles” to get through it truly find 1 thing you really can enjoy and make that bigger and fulfilling.
  3. Think about the harm that impatient does to your body. Your Increased Blood pressure and increased Heart rate and even your stress hormones. And resiliency training can lower your Blood pressure and Heart rate and cortisol level and boost you mood dramatically.

5.What is resiliency training? According to the Mayo clinic, “Resilience is your ability to adapt well and recover quickly after stress, adversity, trauma or tragedy. If you have a resilient disposition, you are better able to maintain poise and a healthy level of physical and psychological wellness in the face of life's challenges.

If you're less resilient, you're more likely to dwell on problems, feel overwhelmed, use unhealthy coping tactics to handle stress, and develop anxiety and depression.

You can develop resilience by learning to train your attention on more-positive aspects of your life. You use purposeful, trained attention to decrease negative thoughts in your mind and bring greater focus on the most meaningful aspect of an experience. It is being flexible and thoughtful to the complete experience not just what you don’t like

Resilience training focuses on four areas, including emotional, cognitive and mental, physical, and spiritual resilience. Training in these areas can improve your resiliency, enhance your quality of life, and decrease your stress and anxiety by teaching you to view life's inevitable challenges as opportunities.”

  1. There is a Japanese practice called Forest Bathing, being in the Forest allows us to be lost in the moment, where nothing exists. You can walk in a park. We respond to Nature. If you can be in Nature for just 15 minutes, it can help you master resiliency. Science is clear that just 15 minutes of walking in green space or a park lowers BP, HR and stress hormones.
  2. Even Virtually in meditation can work as well.
  3. Slowing down your life, will help for you to notice more that is around you. Give you a chance to enjoy more and appreciate what nature give us.

Rise above impatience, during this pandemic even without family for the Holiday and find ways to include family  on Zoom,  have them set a place for you anyways to be thought about and missed and have some fun with family in other ways.

Join the Conversation

AnxietySimplified.net also has Our favorite recordings to answering your questions and from Facebook at AnxietySimplified5.  Leave comments in the comment section, we will answer on a Podcast on that subject.  So, listen for your question.  Or share it with someone who may be helped with that answer. 

Our next podcast: How to have the End of Life Talk, before you need to.

See other podcast at Anxiety Simplified on iTunes

 

Podcast 22: 10 Reasons We Need to Smile

Smiling Faces releases endorphins

Podcast (Audio Only)

In this episode Joanne Williams, LCSW discusses 10 Reasons We Need to Smile- Make A Conscious effort to smile every day.

Summary of today Podcast: 

  1. Smiling Makes Us Attractive
  2. Smiling Relieves Stress
  3. Smiling Elevates Our Mood
  4. Smiling Is Contagious
  5. Smiling Boosts Your Immune System
  6. Smiling Lowers Your Blood Pressure
  7. Smiling Makes Us Feel Good
  8. Smiling Makes Us appear more Attractive.
  9. Smiling Makes You Seem Successful
  10. Smiling Helps You Stay Positive

       Question for today is? Can Smiling make me feel better?

I love to Smile-I do this all the time and I feel I get positive response back from people.  Especially babies.  It is a fun test to play with. Smile at a baby at the supermarket and see their response.

But the pandemic has required wearing a mask and it covers over smiles.  So what can we do?  Make an experiment and see if people respond to you under your mask smiling?  Smile anyways under the mask and send them good thought and vibrations.  Smiling Makes Us Feel Good.

Studies have shown that smiling releases endorphins, natural painkillers, and serotonin. Together these three neurotransmitters make us feel good from head to toe. Not only do these natural chemicals elevate your mood, but they also relax your body and reduce physical pain.

Many see smiling simply as an involuntary response to things that bring you joy or laughter. While this observation is certainly true, Countless scientific studies have shed light on how the act of smiling can elevate your mood and the mood of those around you.

A strong link has been found between good health, longevity, and smiling. Most importantly, studies have shown that just the act of smiling (making the physical facial shapes and movements), whether the result of real joy or an act, can have both short- and long-term benefits on people's health and wellbeing.

  1. Smiling Makes Us Attractive you can use the attraction power of your smile to draw people in. We are naturally drawn to people who smile. There is a real physical attraction factor linked to the act of smiling.
  2. Smiling Relieves Stress Believe it or not, smiling can reduce stress  even if you don't feel like smiling or even know that you're smiling! When you are stressed, take the time to put on a smile. You and those around you will reap the benefits. Stress can permeate our entire being, and can really show up in our faces. Smiling not only helps to prevent us from looking tired, worn down, and overwhelmed but can actually help reduce stress.
  3. Smiling Elevates Our Mood Smiling can trick the body into helping you elevate your mood because the physical act of smiling actually activates neural messaging in your brain.

Next time you are feeling down, try putting on a smile. There's a good chance your mood will change for the better. Smiling can trick the body into helping you elevate your mood because the physical act of smiling actually activates neural messaging in your brain.

A simple smile can trigger the release of neural communication boosting neuropeptides as well as mood-boosting neurotransmitters like dopamine and serotonin. Think of smiling like a natural anti-depressant.

  1. Smiling Is Contagious Smiling not only has the power to elevate your mood, but it can also change the moods of others and make things happier.

How many smiles have been described as having the power to lighten up the room? While it is certainly a beautiful sentiment, it carries a hint of truth. Smiling not only has the power to elevate your mood, but it can also change the moods of others and make things happier.

The part of your brain that is responsible for your controlling the facial expression of smiling is an unconscious automatic response area. Meaning that smiling can be completely unconscious, particularly when it comes to our habit of mimicking another person's smile. Yes, it is scientifically proven that smiles are "contagious!"

  1. Smiling Boosts Your Immune System The act of smiling actually helps the human immune system to function more effectively. Smiling can also boost your overall health. The act of smiling actually helps the human immune system to function more effectively. It is thought that when you smile, immune function improves because you are more relaxed (thanks to the release of certain neurotransmitters).

In addition to taking precautions like washing your hands, why not try to prevent the cold and flu by smiling?

6. Smiling Lowers Your Blood Pressure-Try this one yourself  When you smile, there is a measurable reduction in your blood pressure. Give it a try if you have a blood pressure monitor at home. Sit for a few minutes, take a reading. Then smile for a minute and take another reading while still smiling. Do you notice a difference?

  1. Smiling Makes Us Feel Good Studies have shown that smiling releases endorphins, natural painkillers, and serotonin. Together these three neurotransmitters make us feel good from head to toe. Not only do these natural chemicals elevate your mood, but they also relax your body and reduce physical pain. Smiling is a natural drug.
  2. Smiling Makes Us appear more Attractive. Not only can smiling make you more attractive it can also make you look more youthful. The muscles we use to smile also lift the face, making a person appear younger. So instead of opting for a facelift, just try smiling your way through the day—you'll look younger and feel better.

9. Smiling Makes You Seem Successful Studies have shown that people who smile regularly appear more confident, are more likely to be promoted, and are more likely to be approached. Try putting on a smile at meetings and business appointments. You might find that people react to you differently.

10. Smiling Helps You Stay Positive Try this test: Smile. Now try to think of something negative without losing the smile. It's hard, isn't it?

Even when a smile feels unnatural or forced, it still sends the brain and ultimately the rest of our body the message that "Life is Good!" Stay away from depression, stress, and worry by smiling.

How can you bring a smile to your face or find things in your day to be grateful for. No matter what.  Do it for the next week to add 1 step to having in a happier life right now,

So check them out too.  Anxiety Simplified on iTunes and on my You tube channel named “Anxiety simplified Podcast” has the videos of the podcast, that teaches skills. AND you can easily see my podcast at my website AnxitySimplified.net

Our next podcast: Patience and Resilience to have a Happy Thanksgiving.

Join the Conversation

Our favorite part of recording is answering your questions, from Facebook at AnxietySimplified5.  Leave comments in the comment section, we will answer on a Podcast on that subject.  So, listen for your question.  Or share it with someone who may be helped with that answer.

Podcast 21: 10 things That Makes for a Great Life

Am I Living a Good Life?

Podcast (Audio Only)

In this episode Joanne Williams, LCSW discusses: How do you know you are living the Great life. Taken from Barry Davret article from Medium.com

Question for today is? Does happiness and living a great life only include the material things that others see?           

Summary of today Podcast: 

  1. Do you measure you self-worth by how much your income, job title, possessions, and zip code?
  2. Do you stick with your passion? Make a character commitment.
  3. Do you recognize your mistakes and take responsibility for them and change your responses so that in the future this is not a mistake anymore it is a lesson in life.
  4. Do you take regular inventory of where you are and what it is that you really want to do so that you don’t have regrets at the end of your life.
  5. Can you admit to being wrong, or evaluate your position that may have changed as you mature?
  6. Do you make others feel joy, inspired, or grateful around you?
  7. Do you take 100% responsibility for your own actions and the results of your life choices?
  8. Do you use your emotions as your internal guidance system?
  9. Are you curious?
  10. Have you given up on conditional happiness?

Have you noticed your mood lately and where your mind goes when you listen to the news or listen to someone with a different perspective?

Does this help you live a better or happier life? I have a client who just told me about great things happening In her life new house, new great job with an obscene income,  that is taking her to her dreams of what she THOUGHT she wanted for more income and better career.  But she was overwhelmed and sad and tearful and her relationship is suffering. Why is she feeling this way when these are what we say we want and when our dreams are actually coming true?

We will Explore this. Do you ever listen to your own self talk? Or is that just to woo woo for you and don’t think it helps?  Or think only crazy people talk to themselves.  But, I would ask you to just notice and listen to what is going on beyond your obvious thoughts, that do become invisible, unless you listen to your own self talk.  Are you kind and positive, like a good friend would say to you?  Or are you saying very critical talk with judgements and messages that sound like a critical parents, or that old teacher that told you would never amount to anything.

We will look at 10 things that keep you away from your own happiness or satisfaction.  Most people are not feeling satisfied or even hopeful to ever feel happy, like they did as a child. That glorious feeling of laying on your back in the grass and looking up at the clouds and dreaming and using your imagination to possibilities and the unknown.  What happened? Pressure of work and family and the old thought patterns that are ingrained and invisible coming out to haunt you.

1. Do you measure you self-worth by how much your income, job title, possessions, and zip code? And even like my client I described, when she hit some of those targets, but she wasn’t happier for it. Most time when I wanted, I always craved just a bit more. A bigger boat, a bigger house, until you feel you have gotten enough and know that is not this not the answer.

2. Do you stick with your passion? Make a character commitment. Like my favorite quote of Joseph Campbell. Follow you passion. Joseph Campbell- Follow your bliss. following your Bliss- You will Put Yourself on a track that has been there all along waiting for you to use as your guiding Star.

3. Do you recognize your mistakes and take responsibility for them and change your responses so that in the future this is not a mistake anymore it is a lesson in life that we do as we grow and experience and try things to see what fits.  What is our true passion. Or do you get embarrassed at your past. Maybe that shows your growth, to be proud when you look back at where you have come from.

4. Do you take regular inventory of where you are and what it is that you really want to do so that you don’t have regrets at the end of your life, that sometimes comes earlier than you think?

5. Can you admit to being wrong, or evaluate your position that may have changed as you mature? You know family and friends who cling to outdated views long since proven untrue, yet they lack the maturity and courage to admit they’re wrong? As Dr. Phil says, would you rather be right or Happy? Can you show open-mindedness and humility? Some of the greatest gifts ever for happiness

6. Do you make others feel joy, inspired, or grateful around you? And remaining neutral the rest of the time, you’re a net-positive.

7. Do you take 100% responsibility for your own actions and the results of your life choices? Someone wrote a book the 20 second miracle- when you take 100% responsibility for your life. Everything changes.

You no longer blame anyone for anything that has happened to you.  and you take responsibility for everything that happens now and, in the future,- you can feel the control back of owning your life again.  This is one of the most powerful things you can ever do.  Start to practice this today. The opposite side of the coin from blaming is taking responsibility.  Own it to empower yourself.

8. Do you use emotions as half of any solution? Do you use your emotions as your internal guidance system? 

9. Are you curious? Curiosity is the gap between what you know and what you want to know.

10. Have you given up on conditional happiness?                     There is an idea that to achieve happiness, you must meet specific outcomes in life. Maturity does come with age and experience.  but I realized that living an extraordinary life has nothing to do with your job title, bank account, or how much fame you achieved.

I see that the simpler life brings the most happiness.  Contentment with having enough, of those things.  Satisfaction with your accomplishments.  We are never finished, and I think we think there is a finish line, and we MUST get over it to be feel we are living the good life.

When you FEEL accomplished because you have given to yourself and your family and society.  Why isn’t that enough?  Finding what helps you to feel what is Enough is the finish line in a realizing the good life.  Then declare it is enough.  Give to your self first and then you have more to give others.  And know this is living the good life.

If you feel having a dog or animal in your life as an ESA could help you live the good life.  We do certify for ESA at ESApros.com.  I hear it all the time.  There animal are game changing. Or check out other podcast a AnxietySimplified.net

Our favorite part of recording is answering your questions, from Facebook at AnxietySimplified5.  Leave comments in the comment section, we will answer on a Podcast on that subject.  So, listen for your question.  Or share it with someone who may be helped with that answer. 

Next Podcast: 10 ways Smiling helps your Health

See other podcast at Anxiety Simplified on iTunes

Join the Conversation on Face Book Live every sat. 1pm Eastern time at Joanne’s personal FB     

Podcast 20: 7 ways to live an Awesome Life

Podcast (Audio Only)

Sorry the the sound quality is not the best, my mic was off, but, I want you to hear Karen Stultz awesome information.

Karen Stultz CHT, CIWC , CPC, works as a Mindset Coach, to teach and support women in transition to discover and enjoy life on Purpose with Passion.  And she has her own Awesome Life Podcast can find on all the major platforms.

Summary of today Podcast: A Summary of Today’s Show;

  • Increasing Your Awesomeness Quotient: 7 Simple Steps to building an Awesome Life –
  • Tools For living an Awesome life.
  • Quotes for an awesome life.
  • She has found simple ways to live and love life with Awesome Health, Joy and Freedom!

And Some of our favorite quotes: My favorite quote: “Following your Bliss- You will Put Yourself on a track that has been there all along waiting for you to use as your guiding Star”. Joseph Campbell

Karen’s quote “An awesome Life doesn’t have to be hard…Just allow it.”

Zig Ziglar “Look for the good”

“Comfort Zone is a Beautiful Place, but nothing grows there” A Navy saying.

Karen went into the coaching world and got trained after taking care of her parents with dementia. Then got trained EFT. No popping pills to Heal in the moment in the stress and anxiety. She has a Toolbox of tools to help others.  Allow it.  An Awesome life doesn’t have to be hard. Allow, Wellness, Enjoyment, Success, Openness, Money, Energy is her Awesome Quotient.

We practiced some Emotional Freedom Techniques.

Find Karen’s gift at: www.karenstultz.com Awesome by Design Playbook- 8 areas of life at 50% off.  Stumbling blocks that can be a gift once I look to see.  Mention Anxiety Simplified

Join the Conversation

Our favorite part of recording is answering your questions, from Face book at AnxietySimplified.net.  Leave comments in the comment section, we will answer on a Podcast on that subject.  So, listen for your question.  Or share it with someone who may be helped with that answer. 

Our next podcast: 10 things That Create a Great Life